And lemurs. Mustn't forget about those.

Did my faithful readers truly believe that my dog had run away, or were they joking, just like me? I can't tell anymore. I'm so tired. So, so tired. The three of us went to the Museum of Natural History today and I know you were there, too. I know you were there because everyone in the known universe was there. Everyone was there, meandering through the exhibits, pushing empty strollers in front of them and shouting for their children. Their children, meanwhile, were lagging ten feet behind as they hacked and sneezed into their moist palms and then touched every display, every guardrail, every everything. I don't care if you don't have a child because if you don't you clearly built a child-robot to bring to the AMNH. A germy robot, built just to horrify me. I used half a gallon of Purell on me and my family today. But no amount of Purell can wipe away the memories.

Actually we had fun. It's just that I'm too tired to tell you about the fun. There were quasars. Alaskan bears. Geodes and giant squids and fossilized jawbones. It was wholesome, educational fun. I will need a few days to recover.