You are all sick.

And I love you for it.

I knew you would step up to the plate with your bad-parenting stories, but I never imagined you'd do so with such enthusiasm and so little shame. I have to comb through these many comments and then dole out the honors. Meanwhile, here's this morning's breakfast conversation, which was like so many other breakfast conversations we've had in the Finslippy household:

Scott (singing): "Under my thumb, the girl who once had me down…"

Alice: Great. That's a great song to be singing in front of our child.

Scott: What would you like it to be? "Under no one's thumb/ Enjoying a relationship of mutual respect"? Kind of loses the sexiness of it.

Alice: I was thinking more, "Under her thumb/ I stay at home to make her a nutritious stew." Like that.

Henry: That "nutrition" word doesn't work. It's too fast.

Alice: Too fast? How about "tasty stew"?

Henry: That's better. I like that.

Scott: What are you, Rogers and Hart?

Henry: I have a better song. It goes "Under my butt."