Wow.

You sure are opinionated, when it comes to the eating habits of preschoolers. And many of you are also lurking about, apparently, because then you de-lurk and all hell breaks loose. It's okay--you may return to your former lurkiness. I see you, there in the hedges. Hi! Now you’re waving!

I have learned much from the 400-plus comments on the last post. (Yes, I did read them. Do you think I have anything better to do?) Here are my learnings!

1. Compared to some of your freakish offspring, my child enjoys a healthy variety of foodstuffs. (My favorite is the marshmallows-in-the-Lucky-Charms diet.)

2. The children who eat everything make up for their sophisticated palette by refusing to sleep (thankfully, we don’t have that problem at the Finslippy household).

3.The children who eat everything and sleep well belong to people I don’t want to talk to.

4. I’m kidding about that last part.

5. Forcing your child to eat certain foods will invariably lead to vomiting on the Fiestaware.

6. Not forcing your child to eat certain foods will either result in healthy eating habits or crippling food issues.

7. Many people take the time to comment and only write “Hi!” or its more formal variation, “Hello!”

8. Many people who read Finslippy live in my neighborhood, and are watching, ever watching. And that's fine! Excuse me while I lower my shades!

No, seriously, I liked all the comments! I did! I felt all popular and stuff. I wanted to mail all the comments I got to my junior-high tormentor who would send me threatening notes in Social Studies. YOUR UGLY MEET ME AFTER SCHOOL SO I CAN BEAT YOU UP. (If you’re going to spell it out for me like that, you think I’m going to show up? NO THANK YOU I AM GOING HOME TO WATCH THE LITTLE RASCALS AND EAT CHEESE SANDWICHES.) I don't know if she can receive mail at her mobile home, though, HA HA HA HA HA.

Who am I kidding. She's probably rich and her kid eats kimchee and octopus.

Anyway, I have a newfound appreciation of my son’s dietary habits, and smile tolerantly instead of screaming intolerantly when he squawks in horror at the sight of nutrition. He’s not eating any better, but I sure as hell am drinking more. And that works for me.